5 girls on boys, feminism and peace

Oddities

It’s really interesting talking with people who have different and similar opinions on a topic.

If this were a video you’d be able to see their expressions and all the joking before this. They even insulted me. They said I’m slow at writing, comparing me to stenographers. Imagine that.
Those people are trained at that stuff, others well, they carry midgets.

But it was all fun and games and they had quite some words to dish out.

I asked each girl 5 questions; thoughts on guys in general, thoughts on guys their age, if guys are necessary, thoughts on feminism, thoughts on an excerpt from Chimamanda’s recent statement, on living peaceably with everyone and quotes to live by.

Here’s what they had to say:

  1. Emmanuella, 14

Thoughts on boys:

Boys. They have a natural thing to be rough, ragged and dirty. They argue less and tend to settle stuff physically. They also don’t beat about the bush and seem to be more straightforward. Not to forget, they like to feel in charge.

On guys your age:

They are blind and would do anything that make them seem big and earn respect. They are too forward and they feel like they can do what adults do.

Are guys necessary?

Yes. I don’t know why but they are.

On feminism:

I think there’s no need for it right now because girls do what girls do and even scarier things. The thing is, I don’t think there’s a need for it ever. I suggest nothing because some women are heads of the home.

On Chimamanda’s excerpt:

The quote is partially correct but we cannot remove them (guys) from our lives.

On living peaceably: Agree on things that are obvious. For example, girls shouldn’t change to be guys and guys to girls. It confuses things and doesn’t make for peace because some will never accept that. Let a girl be a girl and a guy be a guy.

Life quote: Be happy and you’ll live longer.

 

2. Wasser, 22

General thoughts on guys:

Guys. Guys are cool. Well, I used to be a tomboy. I grew up with my cousin and a lot of his friends so I’m cool with them. But if you’re rolling with the right crew though, you know. Although they’re cool, they can be annoying and behave like squids and octopuses – trying to suck one’s blood.
You can’t understand their minds but they’re not as complicated as girls. *in YQ’s voice* “Me I like boys boys, me I like boys boys”. Generally, they’re cool friends and I have more male than female friends so I prefer them.

On guys your age:

(Laughing) hmmm, boys my age. I have a few guy friends my age. I don’t talk to my guys my age like that. That’s because some like to behave like bonga fish. There are very few that their minds have baked well. Some have sunk in the middle like cakes that we’re in an oven constantly being opened. To some of them, you just want to ask, “what is this before me?”

Are guys necessary?

Yes, for me. But it depends to others. You can stay without guys but for me o, I like the company of guys and it doesn’t mean I’m an “awusha”.

On feminism:

That thing should be burned at the stake. What is feminism? I hate it. I’m tired of it and I’ll make sure my children, my girls don’t carry it on their heads like “osuka” and water. Kudos to those that support it but I’m not a party to that.

On Chimamanda’s excerpt:

I think that statement is a fraud. Ripping girls of their rights to side talk without restriction. It’s allowed. It’s not by force to talk about guys but whether you like it or not you will talk about them. In the end, it’s your choice.

On living peaceably:

Try as much as possible not to step on people’s toes it may not be easy but as my momma said, “Eat the shit”.

Life quote: All the world’s a stage.

3. Anon, 24

General thoughts on guys:

Guys are wonderful creatures. They are free, happy and can’t be bothered. They move on and don’t seem to hold grudges like that except the ones consumed by the devil. They are care free and can be careless at times.

On guys your age:

Right now, I think guys my age are seeking to make money and build an life for themselves and those living with their parents are seeking to break out.
Relationships seem more secondary at this age and goal achievements, more primary.

Are guys necessary?

They are very necessary. Girls need company. God loves variety that’s why he created male and female. Men add spice and sugar. They are very good company. You need someone to cuddle and they are ever ready to listen especially the ones that like you.

On feminism:

I detest the idea of feminism. I think it is stupid and I don’t know why women stand by it. I don’t see why women should feel oppressed. It may have happened in the past but biblically, men are the head and will always be. There is no point of women fighting for equality. Women who fight for it – why are they married since they’re so against the superiority of men. Why can’t they go and “toast” the men, propose to them, allow them hit them? Why do they wait for them. If you stand for it, stand for it in all entirety.

On Chimamanda’s excerpt:

To an extent, this excerpt is true and I don’t see anything wrong with the quote and women talking about men. Some things are natural. So that’s it.

On living peaceably:

Hmmmm, we as individuals should try to understand people and not judge them because each of us has different opinions. We should try to see other people’s points of view.

Life quote: Love because love is the greatest gift of all.

Bets, 19

General thoughts on guys:

Guys are ego driven human beings, very amazing if allowed to dish out their full potentials.

Thoughts on guys your age:

Guys my age are mostly ego driven too and are influenced a lot by their peer groups. They do not know how to use their time and money and are consumed by the wrong things. They also live their lives for people and not themselves. They are also very materialistic and a lot of them are not generally intelligent or smart.

Are guys necessary?

Yes, guys are necessary. I mean, who would provide sperm for kids?

Thoughts on feminism:

Feminism is all about equality and not about the general assumption that women want to dominate. Feminism is necessary as it has been a man’s world for far too long and that hasn’t gone well and the world would be a better place if women and men have a fair chance at everything.

On Chimamanda’s excerpt:

That statement is a very valid one. If you keep a group of men in a room. The first thing they’ll talk about would most likely be sports not women. They might eventually talk about news and politics and cars and music and women would come up way after. But when you keep a group of women in a room. The first thing would most likely be men that they would talk about. Even if they talk about fashion, they would talk about who the model is dating or something. One way or the other the topic of men finds its way into their discussion. And it’s sad because we give too much space for men in our lives when we are with them and even when we are not.
They are of too much importance in our lives. Like men bring up women when they see one or if peradventure the topic comes up. In conversations, women are not as important to men like how men are important to women.

On living peaceably:

We can live peaceably with ourselves if we see each other as equals because if we do that, we would be able to make the world a very amazing place because we (both men and women) are very powerful once we work together

Life quote: When life gives you pepper, make pepper soup.

5. Omee, 24

Thoughts on guys:

Guys, guys, guys. I think they’re interesting beings who can be annoying and sweet. They can be your worst nightmare or your happily ever after. Then there are those who are there to be the shoulder you can cry on.

Thoughts on guys your age:

Right now, I think a large percentage of them are looking to make money (that’s if they’re not already doing that) and build a future.
It’s almost as if they don’t have girlfriends because they don’t want to have to be broke neither do they want the extra spending. If at all they’re looking for a girl who is serious and willing to build a life with them.

Are guys necessary?

Yes, they are. I grew up in a family where the man was the head with a wife who helped him grow. As a girl, there comes a time when you begin to have needs that only a guy can satisfy. I believe there are some things men are naturally created for.

Thoughts on feminism:

This thing we call feminism, what exactly is it? I believe in equal rights. I believe both genders are of great importance. I’m not a feminist. A lot of girls go out forming feminist when they don’t even have a clue what it’s about. So feminism should be well explained for people to be more informed before they jump into it.

On Chimamanda’s excerpt:

First of all, who said we don’t talk about our own stuff? I won’t disagree that when girls gather, the topic of guys comes up. But I think that is also dependent on the friends and people you hang out with. Even so, the topic of guys will always arise but who says guys don’t talk about girls at all? They do.

On living peaceably:

It can be hard because there will always be that one difficult person. Peace can be achieved but we have to come together to make it work, starting with the stranger on the street. We should show more love despite the craziness in the world.

Life quote: Life is too short so make the most out of it.

In case you never got to read it, here’s some of what Chimamanda said:

‘I think men are lovely, but I don’t think that women should relate everything they do to men: did he hurt me, do I forgive him, did he put a ring on my finger? We women are so conditioned to relate everything to men. Put a group of women together and the conversation will eventually be about men. Put a group of men together and they will not talk about women at all, they will just talk about their own stuff.

‘We women should spend about 20 per cent of our time on men, because it’s fun, but otherwise we should also be talking about our own stuff,’

 

What are your own thoughts?

 

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