So there’s this guy; he’s fine and sensitive and nice and strong and funny and handsome, you know, I could go on and on. He’s everything and the best part…he’s all mine. That’ what you’re telling everyone.

Yeeeeaaaah, right!

Exclusivity is everything. He’s not yours if he doesn’t say it – neither are you his.


We’ve heard those stories where people say, “He never asked me to be his girlfriend for one day. We were just sort of close. We just knew we wanted to be together without having to do the conventional “boyfriend girlfriend” thing. One day, he just proposed and we got married.

Applaudise! He may not have asked you, but he has probably told you you’re his and more importantly told his friends you’re his. In fact, he extends it to the guys who even aren’t his friends (if conversation or circumstance leads). Let’s say they’re having a conversation and the topic of girls come up. If they ask him about his girl, he may not mention your name but at the very least he’d give a description or brief background of you by saying something like, “Well…there’s this one girl sha. We’re still talking and haven’t really gone into anything but…let’s see sha.”

The acquaintances would most likely leave it as that but the friends wouldn’t. I doubt he’d even break the news of talking to a girl he might be feeling to his friends through a large crowd.


But imagine if he hasn’t ever said a word. That means there’s no link.


If his friends can’t find a link, nor an association, nor a connection, nor a simple, “Ohhh, that xyz babe” (although, this is just sad when they can’t even identify you) between you and him, you are – sorry, how do I put this? – nothing to him. The lady on his street whom he buys bread from is something. At least she has a link to him – his bread seller or the lady he buys bread from. As you can see, I even know her and you do too.

If he’s too shy to or ashamed to mention you or “He has his reasons” honey, you need to do a background check. That’s the moment you enter into your zone and just reflect. Ask yourself, “A whole me? Na wa o”.


Remember you are:


There’s a huge difference between “the babe” and “my babe”. You’re either one or none. It’s also one thing for them to you know you and and other to know about you e.g what you are to him.

Again with the almost relationships…

So wash your face. Rub your cream. Read a book. Go jellyfishing.


I’m writing from a girlie like point of view but I guess it applies even to the guys. We all know girls like to talk about “their man” but if she doesn’t or hasn’t – you don’t exist either. Don’t feel so special.


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